Bernadine Fried and her team integrate mindfulness, meditation, and altered states of consciousness into the treatment of addiction and trauma. “We work with remarkable clients who have been blessed with talent, fame, wealth, intelligence, humor, and most importantly heart and soul. “Our success comes by understanding each person’s goals then tailoring our services to their specific needs. Whether we provide services to an individual, a couple, or a small group, we will not be successful without trust and connection. Red Door Life is located in West Hollywood, CA.
FWM: Take us back to your life with addiction and how it led you to start the Red Door Life?
My addiction began very young around the age of 12 or 13 years old. Growing up, my family remained in a constant flow of partying and drug use. The smell of marijuana typically lingered throughout the rooms and we thrived on the chaos. As the youngest in the family, I watched my older siblings as they began to fall deeper into their substance use. My friends would say I lived in the “cool” house because of our “anything goes” mentality. We spent our time jumping off the roof into the pool, conducting ouija board scenes, and lip syncing to Bowie. The carefree atmosphere of the 60s and 70s was the perfect petri dish to fuel my intense addiction later in life. By the time I was 26 years old, I hit my bottom as they say as I was hopelessly addicted to a daily use of heroin and cocaine. But after a decade of rehabs, detoxes, and methadone intense therapies, I was able to get sober on December 10, 1987. Once I had six months of sobriety, I began working with other addicts in recovery attending UCLA Extension and I have been in the field ever since. We started the Red Door in 2018 after a client who I cared for very much died of pancreatic cancer. His beautiful mother, who is an activist for political reform, invited Alex and I over for dinner. At dinner with members of her foundation, my late client’s wife and their 2 year old son, they wanted to help support us with a significant donation to Alex’s nonprofit, the Evergreen Fund, which he started in September 2005. In 2018, we used the donation to start Red Door Life, a wellness community in West Hollywood, California.
FWM: What have you witnessed during this process?
I have witnessed the heartbreaking destruction and chaos caused by addiction and mental health disorders on humans and their loved ones. By April 2020, I began to see the pandemic fuel an explosive epidemic of overdose deaths, relapses, and a rapid decline in people’s mental health. People were struggling with Major Depression, Anxiety, grief and loss among other things. My private practice was completely full and trying to get appointments with psychiatrists who prescribe medications had full 6 month waiting lists. It was clear that COVID was not just a medical crisis but also people’s mental health was in peril. In addition to work in my private practice I also had the honor of working with frontline workers volunteering on a Mental Health COVID-19 Team called GAP Create. We were assigned people that worked administering vaccines, doctors and people that were on the frontline of fighting the virus. Through my volunteer work with GAP Create I learned many new skills to support people in the midst of this global crisis. We Learned techniques that help calm the body down such as Having a way to soothe and regulate the person’s breathing. Additionally I was taught new sleep techniques like Hush that helps people to fall asleep even among all the anxiety and stress of trauma. Through my work with the frontline workers I was able to bring more support to my colleagues and community. Giving back has been the fundamental cornerstone of surviving through the pandemic.
In my thirty years of work in the field I have seen addiction increase. The current global pandemic has caused the rate of addiction overdoses to skyrocket in the US at one of the most alarming rates ever. Fentynal and Methamphetamine use have been at an all time high. The uncertainty, disconnection, isolation and despair brought by the pandemic all have had a deleterious and overwhelming impact on people’s mental health. Finding new ways to treat people suffering from PTSD and learning how to live through uncertainty has been critical this past year.
I have seen many people fostering resilience and having to find alternative ways to cope with profound overwhelming feelings of grief and loss.
FWM: You offer a variety of therapies. Tell us more.
Through my over 30 years working in the field, I have found that trauma and addiction are often married. That is why I became interested in Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing (EMDR.) This is a form of therapy that is specific to desensitizing traumatic memory and to bypass the defenses often associated with talk therapy. I find talk therapy alone is not sufficient to address the deep rooted pain of addiction and mental health. There is a need to find a way to bypass the defenses. I am also trained in Equine Assisted Psychotherapy as I believe horses are intuitive and healing. Horses are prey animals and highly attuned to others as they teach boundaries and ways to connect with people. In addition, a lot of my interest in the past few years has been focused on psychedelics and helping the integration of people that have gone through psychedelic journey work.
FWM: Can you share a few monumental moments working with clients?
I can honestly say I have had many monumental moments working with clients although for many it would be hard to measure. One example is a client that had been to more than 20 treatment centers with a significant diagnosis of C.P.T.S.D. and the inability to stop heroin dependency. In my initial assessment he had almost no eye contact and mumbling explained that “treatment doesn’t work” for him. I thanked him for showing up and we agreed to meet the following day at the same time. I sat the next day and waited 40 minutes. When the client showed up and took a seat he still wouldn’t make eye contact with me but agreed to show up the next day at the same time. Slowly we built trust with consistency and predictability with each session.
Over time he arrived punctual and capable of lifting his head and engaging in the process. It took almost 3 months for us to develop the consistent safe rapport needed for a healing therapy process. We worked together for over five years painstakingly building trust and respect. He was able to eventually feel safe and speak coherently about his life and traumas. We built a strong therapeutic alliance. Today he is in recovery, married happily and with a child. We still stay in contact.
My practice has expanded into helping a significant number of first responders and frontline healthcare workers who have been traumatized. I get to see a lot of people who are suffering begin to have a sense of relief. My ability to work with people who can transform their fear and anxiety into safety happens repeatedly. I consider each of these exchanges as monumental. The fact that through training and all of these years as a therapist gives me the skills to be an ally, and in the role of a witness allows my clients to undo the loneliness and experience safety and a connection sometimes for the first time. I am so grateful to have been given the tools to support people in my community in crisis and find their way back to self.
Red Door Life, 29 N. Wetherly Drive, Suite 209 Beverly Hills, CA 90211
