She is a Formidable Woman. Leisse Wilcox A passionate (and TEDx) speaker, author, podcast host, and cancer survivor, mom of three her entire experience has been about coming home to her truest self and to call herself “beloved,” knowing intimately that changing the world starts by making the changes we want to see within ourselves first. Her book, To Call Myself Beloved: a Story of Hope, Healing, and Coming Home,” debuted at number one in self-esteem and in mental and spiritual healing, number six in movers and shakers, and number 14 in hot new releases – and has been sold in three continents, nine countries, eight Canadian provinces, and 17 American states.
You help high-potential women courageously become the version of themselves they just can’t stop dreaming about. How are you impacting lives?
I give women permission to be themselves: it is that simple, it is that complicated. Most of us spend so much of our lives putting on mask after mask with the intention of pleasing others, doing what we think is expected of us, and going through life as a checklist.
Then we look at the checklist and think “I did everything right: I have the house. The lucrative career. The partner, The family. I have it all…so why doesn’t it feel like it’s supposed to? Why doesn’t this feel like enough? And if this isn’t enough…what am I missing?”
High potential and high achieving women learn the pattern that do, achieve, repeat leads to “success;” but what we’re missing is that until we feel at peace with who we are, no success in the traditional sense will ever be enough. I work with women to find clarity in what they want, confidence in who they are, and the courage to stay true to both – without the fear of being judged or rejected by anyone for doing so. And when my clients get to that incredibly centered and grounded place – knowing who they are as a woman – not as a woman playing the many roles she plays – they are able to show up fully as themselves…which levels up every aspect of their lives in the most genuine way, from business to life, to love.
You are changing the global conversation on emotional health and self-love. What are your key strategies?
Observation and self-reflection, through the lens of curiosity and critical thinking.
We are never taught to feel; we are taught to achieve. We are never taught to explore, we are taught to choose. We are never taught to do what brings us joy and makes us feel grounded, we are taught to do what’s expected of us by any number of external people in our world.
We’re missing these foundational elements: the appreciation of the very real truth that the greatest relationship you’ll ever have is the one you’ll have with yourself. It’s the one we invest the least amount of time, energy, and money in…and instead focus on everything and everyone around us.
We’ve normalized this roller coaster of drama in our lives: we think feeling extreme highs and lows are what it’s supposed to be like, and we’ve lost the sense that living closer to the middle – and dwelling in the comfort of feeling content – is our natural state. We’ve lost the sense that we’re allowed to feel joy, and play, and do the right thing because it’s the right thing to do – not because there’s a condition or reward attached to it.
Simple observation of “what am I feeling in this moment? Where does that come from? What’s it triggered by? What is the story I’m telling myself…and is that story true?” empowers us to get to know ourselves on a much more intimate level, check in with our values and true purpose…and it starts by getting comfortable in the quiet, and with the discomfort that can follow, temporarily.
What motivates you?
I am a single, self-employed mom of three who is only now just getting her hair back after a surprise breast cancer diagnosis in 2018, followed by aggressive chemo and a double mastectomy.
I believe in my tenacity to overcome so fiercely, that I think I’m motivated by my own drive to succeed…just for having the courage to sink fully into who I am and doing what I absolutely LOVE, in a way that allows me to provide a beautiful, engaging life for my three daughters. Leading by example and authenticity – paired with relentless optimism – is at the core of what drives me.
Why are women coming to you today?
Almost every client I have comes to me saying “I don’t know why I need to work with you…but I know that I need to work with you.” There’s a pull towards working with me that comes from being a part of my Instagram or podcast community.
Running an online, service-based business requires a degree of specificity in marketing in order to beat the algorithm and SEO to find your “ideal client…” and I have found that that approach has never worked for me; what works for me is when I am gut-wrenchingly honest and real about navigating the human experience, and appreciating that you have full agency of making your life your own – even if you don’t have full control over each of the events that transpire.
That confidence in what I offer, who I am, and the way in which I’ve chosen not only to navigate years of adversity, but to do so with grace, poise, laughter, and curiosity is like a magnet for women who want to experience lasting change – and not just talk about making the change.
Share client success stories that have moved you.
My clients are high achieving, driven women. They know how to put a plan into action, and aren’t afraid to reflect on their own experiences. When you get to that top rung, from making the decisions you’ve made with the ability to adapt and reinvent as necessary, there comes a moment when you look around and realize there aren’t very many people with you.
The more successful and aligned with following the vision of your life you are, the more real you become…which tends to be an uncomfortable reflection for others around you. And then, because we are still human and crave connection, and battle the normal human emotions of lingering self-doubt or imposter syndrome, we realize the trade-off it took to get to where we are.
I become this vessel for my incredible clients to turn to. To talk to. To bounce ideas off of. To express – out loud – some of the feelings they are often too ashamed to say to their partner, their friends, or to themselves. I become this warm and nurturing – almost mother or mentor style container – for them to really say what’s on their mind, and start to dig deep on where that’s coming from, and what it looks like to evolve, once again, from here.
Although my clients each come to me for something unique – I joke that I’m like the Wizard of Oz, just come to me and I’ll help you cultivate what it is you need more of – they each leave with an almost identical reaction: “That. Was. Magic.”
The biggest metric of their success is the most challenging to measure: they simply feel better, and much more free to be who they are. (Interestingly? The “husband testimonials” are some of the most “measurable” insights; often my clients’ husbands will say, when we’ve finished our six months of work together “I thought this was going to be a waste of money…but wow. I can’t believe how much more relaxed, centered, and confident she is; she just seems like herself…but even better.”)
You are a passionate TEDx speaker, Author, and Top Podcast Host. What are your key areas of discussion?
I am obsessed with the notion of Emotional Alchemy: our ability to take something dark, heavy, and unwanted and consciously transform it into something light, golden, and uniquely our own. My podcast, writing, and speaking are all centered around this, stemming from one place: courage.
I am fascinated by the fact that we are all sharing a very similar human experience, with the full range of human emotions. And yet? Each of us feels like we’re alone like we’re experiencing this in isolation – with or without COVID. My passion is to change that conversation on our emotional health, globally through the reach of my presence and platforms, and turn our attention towards establishing a foundation of love and acceptance upon which we can authentically create literally anything else we dream of on top of that.
My site, LeisseWilcox.com is the hub to access it all, including the many mainstream media features in which I’m interviewed (Forbes, ABC, CBS, Elephant Journal, and Thrive Global have been some very proud moments).
Tell us about your book, “To Call Myself Beloved: a Story of Hope, Healing, and Coming Home.”
This book is a self-love manifesto.
It debuted at number one in self-esteem and in mental and spiritual healing, number six in movers and shakers, and number 14 in hot new releases – and has been sold in three continents, nine countries, eight Canadian provinces, and 17 American states.
This is the book I was so desperately searching for when I was navigating the three most cataclysmic events of my life: confronting and healing from an abusive childhood, a painful divorce, and breast cancer.
Equal parts memoir, self-help, and the feeling that you’re cozied up on the couch with a trusted friend, the feedback from this bestselling book has consistently been “wow – I’ve never read a self-help book that has actually helped me; I’m only a few chapters in, and I can already feel a shift.”
I am so proud of this book, not only because of the satisfaction of writing a successful book – but because it’s having the desired effect: it’s inviting people to change the global conversation on emotional health and self-love, even during times of unprecedented change through a pandemic.
This is what it feels like to have an impact on the world.
What are you looking forward to for the remainder of the year?
In October I am booked to shoot Season Two of The Social Movement, a docuseries that brings together experts in their fields from all over the world, coming together to solve real-world problems, then pitch the solutions to a team of investors.
I am hopeful that my book has the opportunity to expand into its own docuseries, and give more people more access to the life-shifting perspective I can offer. I’m doing my Master level NLP practitioner as well, to offer my clients an even more informed approach to releasing limiting beliefs and healing forward to become the vision of themselves they can’t stop dreaming about…and the fall colors in the rolling hills of where I live near Toronto, Canada are so spectacular that I’m looking forward to getting tacos with my kids, and enjoying the simple pleasure of being together.
